LOLITA (LOLO) DEMATEO, a scruffy, boyishly built eighteen-year-old, unwed mother is the granddaughter of legendary heavy weight boxing champion, JOHNNY “THE PROFESSOR,” DEMATEO known for “schooling” opponents while vanquishing them and who, ironically, died in the ring following a lethal blow to the head which caused an instant irreversible brain injury. Recently, his daughter, LOLO’s mother, has also passed away, leaving LOLO alone to care for her toddler son JOHNNY DEMATEO JR., with no means of support.
While signing up for welfare benefits LOLO hears about try outs for a reality t.v. show, “FINAL ROUND,” which will feature female boxers. Though LOLO has never boxed, when she hears first prize is $10,000.00, her interest is peaked.
LOLO’s only other relative, brother ROBERTO (BOBBY) DEMATEO, returns from the West Coast pursued by two motor-cycle riding, leather clad cartel enforcers tasked with recouping money owed from a drug deal gone bad. The enforcers, JOAQUIN, hyper macho, & RIKKI, chattily feminine and witty, are a gay couple. This darkly comic duo execute all their antics accompanied by a comedic litany, mostly from RIKKI, who is the one in charge (think John Leguizamo or The Q Brothers).
LOLO and BOBBY agree that BOBBY can share LOLO’s tiny studio apartment on the upper floor of a shabby two-flat on Chicago’s Northwest side in return for helping care for little JOHNNY and contributing some rent money so LOLO can avoid being sexually harassed by her landlord, MANNY, who is threatening to evict her if she does not either come up with her back rent or sleep with him.
Elsewhere in the city, FIN, “THE FORCE” FLANNERY (avuncular, old-school), former trainer of LOLO’S grandfather, is approached by his young assistant, MARIA “KNOCKOUT” DE JESUS, who seeks his blessing to try out for “FINAL ROUND.” After going off on one of his frequent tirades about “lack of pension funds, medical benefits and overall respect for boxers,” FLANNERY tells MARIA to do what she wants so long as she does nothing to embarrass the profession in what will likely be a lot of “phoney baloney crap.”
“FINAL ROUND” is the creation of BENNY EICHOFF one of THE THREE EICHOFF COUSINS (BENJAMIN (BENNY), dark haired with bangs, KENNITH (KENNY), a mop of curly, blond hair, & LEONARD (LENNY), chubby, balding & squeaky voiced, (think modern day 3-Stooges) whose wealthy parents have bought them everything from their educations to their occupations. When KENNY & LENNY balk at having to invest money in BENNY’S “hairbrained scheme,” he reminds them how he has always backed them and assures them his dad, a producer, will cover all costs except advertising and PR. KENNY & LENNY finally agree to contribute but say they know the only reason BENNY is doing the show “FINAL ROUND” is to keep his girlfriend, YOLANTA, around a while longer. YOLANTA, an Eastern European vamp, has BENNY wrapped around her little finger and he has agreed to rig the bouts in “FINAL ROUND” so that she will walk away with the $10,000.00 first prize money. YOLANTA, who claims to be a boxing fan, has a “personal trainer” (and, unknown to BENNY, love interest) TYRONE (a hunky, ladies’ man) who boxes. But in truth, she is not athletic at all and TYRONE, whose trademark is his rhinestone studded sneakers, is all glitz and no grit as well.
Audition day at St. Andrews Gym, contestants are being chosen more on looks than talent. LOLO is neither flashy looking nor skilled. However, realizing she is related to the famous JOHNNY “THE PROFESSOR,” DEMATEO, the EICHOFF COUSINS choose her hoping she will bring them lots of free publicity. MARIA, too, is chosen.
LOLO, tracks down her grandfather’s old trainer FIN FLANNERY and explains that she was chosen for “FINAL ROUND” and instructed to go “get a few boxing moves.” FIN agrees to help her but only if she approaches training seriously. She unenthusiastically agrees and FIN assigns her to MARIA for training. LOLO’s first training session is a dismal failure and she flees the gym with a bloody nose but after being harassed again by MANNY, she returns a few days later to try again. Meanwhile Bobby, having disguised his appearance to elude JOAQUIN & RIKKI, is working as a bouncer at a neighborhood night spot “The Corner Club,” which, as it happens, is frequented by YOLANTA and TYRONE’s crew.
YOLANTA is crazy about TYRONE who is only sticking with her because she has agreed use her “FINAL ROUND” prize money to pay his screen test. As YOLANTA is playing BENNY, who is truly smitten with her, so TYRONE is playing YOLANTA.
LOLO’s second attempt at training proves much more successful than her first and she and Maria, although competitors in “FINAL ROUND,” bond as friends. LOLO’s newfound discipline begins to show in other areas of her life, like in her apartment which is now clean and cheerful, and her food choices. When MANNY comes for back rent, she confidently shoves some of the money BOBBY has given her in his face and shuts the door on him.
During an elimination round, contestants are excused from “FINAL ROUND” including, to the shock of everyone present, MARIA. LOLO, whose involvement is, in fact, generating publicity, makes the cut and receives her first “training expenses” which she tries to split with MARIA who declines promising to continue training her as before. Remaining contestants have been chosen based on looks and there are no more serious athletes in the group. YOLANTA has yet to participate in the show in any meaningful way.
BENNY shows up at YOLANTA’S apartment for a date which she has apparently forgotten about. She answers the door anxious and scantily clothed. While waiting for her to dress BENNY spies If a cheap tadalafil 20mg icks.org male follows the methods, he can overcome the problem of PE. The patient feels a sense of community he is surrounded by viagra on line pharmacy support and fellowship. Nonetheless, 3.7 million are expected to hit the doughnut hole this year, and many will face unpalatable choices: Do without basics or do without medication. generic viagra purchase It possible to ward off the release of nitric oxide is icks.org sildenafil cialis the one that makes penis relaxed. one of TYRONE’S trademark rhinestone encrusted kicks under an end table and suddenly realizes YOLANTA must have been entertaining TYRONE. He says nothing but is obviously upset in what is the first of several incidents which will force him to realize YOLANTA doesn’t really care for him. After he and YOLANTA depart, TYRONE slips out from the bedroom closet, where he was hiding, and quietly sneaks out of the apartment.
LOLO had cooked dinner for MARIA and presents her with a new set of boxing gloves…pink!! MARIA, playing happily with little JOHNNY, offers to watch him for a couple of minutes while LOLO runs down to the Corner Club to bring her brother some food and some change from the rent money he gave her. While there, LOLO runs into TYRONE and YOLANTA the latter of whom berates LOLO viciously informing her that she can never win the contests because it is already decided that she, YOLANTA, will win.
Meanwhile, back at LOLO’S apartment, JOAQUIN & RIKKI force their way in looking for BOBBY. MARIA tells them she does not know any BOBBY but they trash the place anyway in a darkly comedic scene (i.e. we’re doing you a favor to slash that sofa because it is out of style and clashes with that chair, etc.) and threaten to do worse if BOBBY does not make good on his debts.
LOLO approaches THE EICHOFF COUSINS to ask if it’s true that the contest has been decided already and is told to be glad for whatever she’s getting and to not question executive decisions. Dejected, she tells FIN and MARIA that she is quitting the show because it is fixed. FIN tells her about a famous fight her grandfather was supposed to lose but ended up winning and gives her a pep talk: “It ain’t over till it’s over.” LOLO decides to stick it out.
JOAQUIN & RIKKI turn up on the street outside LOLO’s and confront BOBBY, who is bringing little JOHNNY back from the zoo. BOBBY pleads it wasn’t his fault and the other guys gave him an empty suitcase but they tell him he still owes the money. He tells them his sister is in “FINAL ROUND” and if she wins they can pay back all the money. RIKKI becomes very excited on hearing about “FINAL ROUND,” his favorite show. Apologetically he explains they will still need to kidnap little JOHNNY and hold him for ransom, till the debt is paid but that they are crossing their fingers for LOLO who is RIKKI’s favorite. RIKKI, promising ice-cream and toys, is so maternal towards little JOHNNY so that the child does not even realize he is being kidnapped as they disappear down the street on a motorcycle driven by JOAQUIN and his little red zoo balloon slips from his fingers and sails off into the sky.
Final taping of “FINAL ROUND” is occurring before a live studio audience. JOAQUIN & RIKKI, with little JOHNNY are amount the throngs of fans waiting to get in to see the show. They are quibbling good naturedly about whether or not anyone might recognize them dressed as they are, head to toe, in preppy cloths. RIKKI is adamant that little JOHNNY deserves a chance to see his mother fight.
LOLO, who has acquired serious skills over the course of her training, has prevailed over her last opponent and been declared runner up and now it is just her and YOLANTA left to fight the final round for the $10,000.00. YOLANTA is out in the hall with TYRONE when BENNY turns the corner to advise her that she is up. We see his expression at this final evidence of YOLANTA’s betrayal of him. YOLANTA enters the ring dressed entirely in gold wearing full make up and believing all she has to do is strut around the ring a few times and pick up her check for $10,000.00.
As the fight begins, JOAQUIN, on RIKKI’s wordless orders, has lifted little JOHNNY up onto his shoulders so he can see as the two women move about the ring. He is clapping as LOLO lands some punches on YOLANTA who, believing it’s all part of the plan, laughs and struts some more. But when LOLO keeps coming at her YOLANTA begins to realize LOLO is fighting for real. When she looks towards BENNY for explanation he just looks away. LOLO knocks out YOLANTA and the ring announcer, after receiving a nod from BENNY, announces LOLO winner of both the runner up round and the final round. As the crowd cheers she is handed two checks totaling $15,000.00.
Little JOHNNY, followed by JOAQUIN & RIKKI, makes his way thru the crowds calling out to his mommy. The two reunite and LOLO holds out the checks to JOAQUIN and RIKKI in payment of BOBBY’S debt. RIKKI tells her to forget it and consider the matter settled. When JOAQUIN expresses concern, RIKKI shushes him and says he will deal with Chuy. Then he hands LOLO the diaper bag, coos over JOHNNY and tells him Uncle Joaquin and Uncle Rikki will be back to visit him if it’s OK with mommy.
Based on “FINAL ROUND’s” success. BENNY, who is now dating LOLO, has been given the “green light” for another reality T.V. show and has invited her to assist him with it. “POSERS” will feature young, single mothers impersonating members of their dream profession/occupation. After being scored on their “job performance” by random, unsuspecting members of the public the contestant’s true identity will be revealed “Candid Camera” style. Winners will receive education and job-training and will be introduced to mentors in their chosen field. Bobby is now permanent manager of Corner Club. Funds have been donated to FIN & MARIA to implement programs to benefit disadvantaged, young boxers. And YOLANTA & TYRONE have each latched on to new victims. Everyone’s happy in the end.